$$$. What Came, Went & Got Stacked (Tax Season)

Over the past few days I’ve been doing the deep dive into some scary shit. My finances. Every year around this time (Tax Season ) I sit and calculate my earnings as best I can. I try and record every shift’s take home, tho some nights you get distracted by a pint of mint chocolate chip and then pass out instead. But after hours of what felt like the watching paint dry- Totaling the days I worked, how much I payed in house fees, how much I saved and the dreaded: HOW MUCH I SPENT. (gets chills, swigs tequila) I am super proud to say that I earned more than I thought! I also spent more then I thought. SHOCKING. But here’s the thing, in taking an honest look at roughly every dollar that came, went and got stacked- I’m now able to make practical adjustments and projections for growth in 2018. And in spite of seeing how many 0’s went vs. got stacked, Being able to understand HOW it happened has got me feeling so fucking boss. Let’s be real, it can feel intimidating af to even think, let alone look honestly at your money and to see where it’s gone. And who knows, Maybe if we were all taught practical money management skills and financial planning in Math class we’d feel differently...

But one thing’s for sure: It doesn’t matter if you never used a calculator in your life, You are a resourceful Queen who’s learned how to successfully hustle this cash, So you bet your ass, you can learn how to manage and grow it. Xxo, Val

Calling All Strippers:

OUR JOB IS REAL. 

OUR WORK IS VALID. 

and 

WE DESERVE FAIR & SAFE WORKING CONDITIONS. 

It is not a luxury to have our safety come before the comfort of a customer, 

Regardless of his wallet size. 

It is not a luxury to keep a majority of the money we earned for the work we did. 

It is not a luxury to be employed without being:

discriminated against, harassed, assaulted, intimidated and extorted

by VIP hosts, management, owners, or any other employee of the club who feels so fucking entitled.  

It is not a luxury to retain the rights of an independent contractor, 

Without fear of losing our job, 

When we are not being paid an hourly wage or provided health benefits. 

IT IS NOT A LUXURY TO BE RESPECTED.

Regardless of your race, gender, size 

Regardless of how we got into the industry, 

Regardless of how much we earn.

To My Stripper-Sisters, 

I deeply relate to the complexities involved with not internalizing shame and feelings of less-than put upon us by the patriarchy. 

I too still grapple with justifying the validity of my work as a Stripper solely with those big money nights. 

(see here with how I cope)

I understand how it can sometimes feel like the only way to prove how funding our lives and dreams with Stripping is "worth it,"

Is if we have bigger, better and more than civilians...

As if our stacks, passport stamps and Louboutin's, are our best defense from the hurt society throws at us for something they were taught to be afraid of. 

This is not to say that having financial/lifestyle goals and working hard to attain them isn't important.

It's to say that ONLY feeling like the work we do is valid when we are rolling in the dough is directly related to the harmful belief that Stripping is not a "real job."

TO UNDERMINE STRIPPING AS A "REAL JOB" MAKES IT INCREDIBLY HARD TO BELIEVE WE DESERVE BETTER WORKING CONDITIONS. 

We are consenting people providing a service to other consenting people who wish to pay for it. 

That money then goes on to allow us, at it's most basic level, 

To live.

So whether it's an average night, a terrible night or a super fucking lit night- 

Let us do ourselves a favor, and remind ourselves (and if you have to, fake it till you feel it):

OUR JOB IS REAL. 

OUR WORK IS VALID. 

and 

WE DESERVE FAIR & SAFE WORKING CONDITIONS.

Womens March: DO BETTER

This past weekend, on the anniversary of the inaugural Womens March, I joined millions of women and our allies in calling to attention how our rights or lack-there-of are being violated.  Though the energy was powerful, the rally itself, was far from ideal.

I was completely disheartened by how Womens March tokenized Sex Worker and Trans activists and purposely restricted our formal participation- both before and during the rally, to the bare minimum. As women we are already marginalized- BUT To create a “hierarchy” within this marginalization by prioritizing specific communities only fractures the collective feminist agenda. It sends the very clear message that some matter more than others.

As a cis gendered white woman I was inspired by and felt it necessary that the women of color and white women who implored during their speeches, that we acknowledge our place within privilege and use it to fight equally as hard for our less privileged sisters. This reminder is imperative to the empowerment of the matriarchy. But where was the intersectional cry of support for Sex Workers and Trans Women?

Now it’s hard to put a finger on why exactly I feel like Sex Workers (and our Trans-sisters) were “invited” just to fill a quota, keep calm a potential internet shit-storm and protect important donors from seeing how bigoted Womens March is, BUT It definitely has a bit to do with how other groups were allowed many speakers, longer stage and screen time and how they were also personally celebrated by the core organizers of Womens March. That being said, I AM SO INCREDIBLY MOVED BY HOW MY SEX WORKER, TRANS SISTERS AND ALLIES SHOWED THE FUCK UP. The organization, support and all the noise brought when we finally had our time to speak was perhaps one of my proudest moments as an activist and I thank you so much for being the dedicated, power houses you are.

Yes, the feminist movement is incredibly fractured and far from ideal but it does not discredit the advancements we have made and will continue to make. After all we are human and we are flawed. May we we keep showing up and keep making noise so that it continues to increase the visibility we need to effectively create conversation and inspire more women to fight along side us.

Much love to all of my dear friends who rallied along side me and in spirit, y’all are my life force and I will always be loud and proud as fuck to rep our cause.

Xxo -Val