A Big Fish... & The Tyranny of Burn Out
The bite was subtle, and if it weren’t for the captain ogling each of our rods I would have missed it. I don’t know if it was the soft...
top of page
Valerie Stunning
- May 15
Hindsight Is A Dish Best Served Cold (Greetings from the Philippines)
Someone who was trying to sell me something once, paid me a compliment by saying I was a weapon. Having built an entire career out of...
Valerie Stunning
- Apr 17
Stripper Retirement, Definitely. (Part 2)
After thirteen years of professional thotting- across 3 continents, 4 countries,10 states, 17 cities, and 37 clubs- I have officially...
Valerie Stunning
- Mar 20
Stripper Retirement, Probably. (Part 1)
Teetering on the kind of hysteria that only blaring trap music in an empty strip club can incite, I grabbed a blanket from VIP and...
Valerie Stunning
- Jan 17
I'll take 'Anal Clenching' for $600 Alex
I don’t Jeopardy often but when I do I am instantly transported to 1991-1992, when I was about 6 to 7 years old. The game show takes me...
Valerie Stunning
- Dec 20, 2023
Bye! For now...
After a thorough expedition through the metaverse I am happy to report that I did not half ass it. No. If there’s one thing about me, it...
Valerie Stunning
- Dec 6, 2023
The Other
We were dying a slow death in the back of our ride-share. Our condition, post-thanksgiving agita. Slumped in a pile of gastro-intestinal...
Valerie Stunning
- Oct 18, 2023
The 4 Types of People Who Run Strip Clubs
I sat in silence at the kitchen table in awe of my purple and blue legs as the night’s tequila shots slowly wore off. My knees and shins...
Valerie Stunning
- Oct 4, 2023
Gone Feral
There should be a Nobel Prize for well executed Irish exits. While they seem to really grate on some people’s nerves I’m positive they’re...
Valerie Stunning
- Sep 20, 2023
Overhyping The Hustle, Are We Caught Up? (Final)
By year three of grinding on dudes for dollars I had had enough shitty experiences with civilians (both customers and not) that had...
Valerie Stunning
- Sep 6, 2023
Overhyping The Hustle, Are We Caught Up? (Part 2)
If you haven’t read Part 1, I recommend doing so before continuing. Cheers! When I first started writing this piece I thought it was only...
Valerie Stunning
- Aug 16, 2023
Overhyping The Hustle, Are We Caught Up? (Part 1)
I took a break at work recently and was bombarded with a Tik Tok that gave me, what I can only describe in my best Jersey I-talian accent...
Valerie Stunning
- Aug 2, 2023
Once You Know, You Can't Un-know (Part 2)
I am naturally and quite possibly genetically gifted with a massive ego. After all I come from flamboyantly bombastic stock, with equal...
Valerie Stunning
- Jul 19, 2023
Once You Know, You Can't Un-know (Part 1)
I have often considered myself the McDonalds of strippers. Particularly when hustling in Las Vegas. My particular skillset and emotional...
Valerie Stunning
- Jul 10, 2023
A Tough Pill To Swallow
I spent the last few years engaging less with the internet, and all it led to was a whole new perspective on life. Shocking, I know. I...
bottom of page