The Best Revenge

Beyonce once said, the best revenge is your paper. 

I disagree. 

The best revenge is how you redistribute your paper AFTER you’ve invested in yourself first. 

One of the most damaging stigmas in Stripping is how we’re conditioned to have pride or see value in the work we do solely based on being a top earner. 

And who can blame us?! We spend very long hours in very tall shoes being of physical and emotional service to very confused men, 

Men who even in their most gracious and generous states only ever partially respect the magic we bring to their lives…

So naturally, after working a job that even the beneficiaries of your services don’t fully respect, never-mind society, 

Often times, the only way to feel seen and validated is to yell on the top of your fucking lungs in the one language everyone understands and respects: 

Money. 

Now, before I continue, let’s get one thing straight- 

I love money. 

I love buying fancy salt, traveling the world and treating my girlfriend to bougie steak dinners. 

Even more so, 

I love the freedom money gives me.. to go hard after my dreams and support the communities / causes I believe in. 

So please, don’t get it twisted-

I don’t believe that striving toward financial goals and feeling ourselves once we’ve accomplished them is wrong.

HOWEVER, 

I do believe that we should be cautious against the trappings of patriarchal capitalism as the end all, be all in proving we are deserving and worthy of respect. 

This job’s earning potential has the ability to completely change lives. It did mine. 

But it wasn’t until I finally stopped internalizing my earnings as merits of worthiness that I stopped feeling in competition with others. 

Which led me to save more, invest in my dreams and understand just how healing and transformational our spending power can be. 

For our communities and for ourselves. 

The moral of the story is, if you really want to get revenge on the patriarchy, invest in yourself first

and then, 

Redistribute the money you’re going to spend anyway, that you’ve likely earned from men (and in my case, white men) and give it to Women / Sex Worker / LGBTQ / POC / Immigrant workers, services and businesses.

Happy Hustling, Xxo- Val

A Celebration Of Indulgence, Paradise City Creamery

When I decided to turn my hobby of making plant-based ice cream into a business- 

I always knew the magic I’d bring to this industry was an experience, respect and profound love of my previous glittering neon world. 

*From burlesque cabarets to dank tittle bars I have pranced, shimmied, contorted, winded and grinded on international stages for nearly a decade. Naked. 

#celebrateindulgence

Tho to be real, celebrating indulgence is more than just a mantra. 

It’s a lesson learned in the wee hours of many warm vanilla scented mornings, taught to me via the emotional & physical intimacies I’ve shared with complete strangers. 

It’s a reckoning that the act of safely indulging in things we find pleasurable can be transformative regardless of how trivial they may seem.

I’ve thought long and hard on how this ideology would live in my creamy new world...

How in addition to Paradise City’s flashy aesthetic, celebratory vibes and bomb ass flavors, we could be more.

And what this meant was we had to embody, from the ground up, ALL I believed and stood for. 

That Paradise City Creamery would always create a space where the people we hired, collaborated with and served were of and/or in support of the communities I have found identity in and/or have been deeply inspired by. 

Sex Workers. LGBTQ. POC. Women. 

Because if I have learned anything, it’s that capitalism may be a catalyst for a lot that is wrong in our society

but 

It CAN be reclaimed when you produce genuine work that effectively contributes to the pleasure you wish to see in the world.

International Whores Day 2019

For every time I was forced to psychologically & physically out maneuver a predatory Club owner/ investor/employee/client-

Sometimes successfully, sometimes not-

Because the laws and loopholes that protect them, do not validate my job and therefore do not protect me..

For every time I was made to feel disposable and afraid to lose my job-

Because when you and your work are not validated, you are not seen and when you are not seen you are susceptible to abuse.

For every time I broke down and burnt out because the isolation we feel as Sex Workers is very fucking real.

For every time I’ve internalized how stigma has conditioned society to believe that being at risk to experience mental, emotional and/or physical violence is part of our job description,

For every time confiding in my loved ones left me feeling dismissed or victim blamed because they hadn’t realized how they too had internalized this Stigma.

For every time I was advised to just find a different job,

As if liking my job all the time is a requisite for having rights and protection?!

I STAND HERE LOUD and SO FUCKING PROUD. 

Proud of you, my community, our collective work to bring awareness to our diverse needs and issues according to the various jobs we do, 

and 

Most importantly to stand in solidarity with the most marginalized in our community who are criminalized for trying to survive. 

Thank you Sex Workers for making me feel seen, protected and validated. 

Thank you Sex Workers for listening to my 2 cents about the things I experience and ponder. 

Thank you Sex Workers for contributing your 2 cents and for endlessly inspiring me. 

Thank you Sex Workers for correcting me when I fuck up.

THANK YOU SEX WORKERS FOR EDUCATING ME.

Thank you Sex Workers for teaching me compassion for myself which in turn becomes compassion for others. 

Thank you Sex Workers for being the resilient, resourceful and revolutionary spirits you are, we are. 

HAPPY INTERNATIONAL WHORES DAY. 

If you are in Vegas, we invite you to march & rally in solidarity with us today. 

Meet: 6pm Llama Lot. Wear Red.

After party: @JammylandLV (swipe for details) 

See you there! Xxo, Val

#IWD2019